Part 2. “Jump more cheerfully!”. Hieromonk Pafnuty (Fokin) (2024)

Part 1. The Protection of the Mother of God

The Great Schema

Part 2. “Jump more cheerfully!”. Hieromonk Pafnuty (Fokin) (1) Fr. Mikhail in the sanctuary of the Refectory Church on Pascha In October of the same year (1988), the Lavra Abbot, Archimandrite Alexei (Kutepov), tonsured Fr. Joasaph into the great schema with the name Mikhail in honor of the Archangel Michael.

Before that, Fr. Alexei came to Fr. Joasaph, who by that time had not been able to eat for two weeks, and asked him, “Are you ready to receive the schema?” He answered in a childlike manner, “Nope!” After the father-superior had left, the elder, turning to St. Sergius, whose icon hung opposite, said, “You are happy—you’re already in Heaven; but how hard will it be for me here in the schema? I’m not ready yet.” Four days later, when batiushka couldn’t even drink, at some point he suddenly said softly, “Call the father-superior.” About twenty monks came to the elder together with the father-superior, and Fr. Joasaph was tonsured into the great schema.

After receiving the great schema, Fr. Mikhail went on the mend. From that day on he never left the Lavra. The mother-superior of the Holy Dormition Convent in Gremyachevo in the Kaluga region, Abbess Mikhaila (Osipova), recalled:

“Thanks to batiushka’s holy prayers, new monasteries were built and flourished, headed by his spiritual children: in Maloyaroslavets (the Kaluga region), Kaluga, Khabarovsk, Tyumen, Saratov, in the Caucasus, in Kuzbass, and even in America. Orthodox orphanages were opened. Together with the sisters of the convents, batiushka repulsed all the enemy attacks on the young monastic communities, mysteriously passing on his spiritual experience to their abbesses. The elder used to say that God has one big monastery scattered all over the globe, and all the monastics are one big family. And we felt this unity with all our hearts.”

The elder was also given special attention by Abbess Nikolaya and the sisters of St. Nicholas “Black Island” Convent of Maloyaroslavets. After Pascha and Christmas, they would visit batiushka with the girls of their orphanage. It was unusual to hear troparia and Christmas carols being sung in the brethren’s quarters by sonorous children’s voices, and, entering the cell, to see it filled with elegant girls diligently singing chants under the direction of the sisters, their mentors. Such meetings meant a lot to Fr. Mikhail and, undoubtedly, remained forever in the memory of all those present.

Archpriest Sergei Pravdolyubov (†2024) remembered the elder with great fondness:

“He was an absolutely amazing priest! My sister Elena knew him well, because for several years she worked at the Patriarchal Residence in Peredelkino and often communicated with him. Through her he gave me a marvelous gift—the pectoral cross of Archimandrite John (Krestiankin). I would never have been able to sacrifice such a relic, but he did! Only monks can give such presents! I keep this cross as a precious relic from two elders at once—from Father John and Father Mikhail. Our family also keeps crosses from Father Mikhail, which he himself carved—intended for putting into the deceased’s hand in the coffin. My parents were buried with such crosses, and one more cross is reserved for me. There is also a pectoral cross-reliquary with particles of the relics of saints. Thus, our family’s link with Father Mikhail and the Holy Trinity-St. Sergius Lavra continues—and this is such love and such joy!”

Fr. Sergei reposed two weeks before Fr. Mikhail’s centenary: he passed away on August 24 of this year. And his hand in the coffin tightly clutched the cross carved by Fr. Mikhail.

Another cross-reliquary, carved by batiushka, is now kept by the brethren. There is a tradition at the Lavra: Whenever someone goes on obedience to a war zone to pastor the military, he takes the front-line soldier’s cross with him.

Fr. Mikhail was the epitome of love, joy and childlike ingenuousness. He could take a cabbage stump and, showing it to his cell-attendant, exclaim cheerfully, “Look, it’s like a dolphin!” Or he could ask his cell-attendant to bring him an armful of leaves from the street and admire what beauty God created.

One day Fr. Mikhail was asked, “Have you ever loved somebody?” He replied, “Yes, very much! I had a little sister, Manechka [a diminutive form of the name Maria.—Trans.]. When she and I went to graze geese in the morning—barefoot on sharp sedge—I crawled in front of her and flattened the sedge so that she wouldn’t cut her feet.” That’s what love he had!

Suffering from severe illnesses and weakness, Schema-Archimandrite Mikhail spent the final years of his life in his cell. The elder left it only a couple of times a year: when the brethren took him in a wheelchair to church to the common brethren’s unction during Lent and on Pascha. At the same time, he was always in a cheerful state of mind, joked about his infirmities and always responded to requests for short instructions, especially when someone was choosing his life path and was thinking of taking monastic vows.

And on the elder’s name day, the feast of the Archangel Michael, after a festal meal the brethren, headed by the abbot, would go to his cell to greet him. After singing “Many years!”, Vladyka Theognost (the Lavra abbot at the time) would address Fr. Mikhail with a congratulatory speech and add at the end:

“Fathers, watch and learn: the elder is so weak and infirm, but in what a state of joy he always remains!”

The elder truly shone with the triumphant Paschal joy, despite his great physical infirmities. He could comfort, pity and inspire others, while remaining bedridden himself. There was a feeling of the sacrament of the monastic cross by his side: the Lord gave Fr. Mikhail strength and wisdom to help others and solve very difficult problems, being so weak, according to the Apostle Paul’s words, My strength is made perfect in weakness (2 Cor. 12:9).

Part 2. “Jump more cheerfully!”. Hieromonk Pafnuty (Fokin) (2) Schema-Archimandrite Mikhail (Balaev) Batiushka took the doctors’ recommendations very responsibly, tried to follow all their prescriptions carefully and take his medicine on time. The doctors also performed their “obedience” to monitor the elder’s health with joy, visiting him regularly, treating him in his cell and periodically at the hospital. In their opinion, you could only wonder how batiushka endured his ill health for the final fifteen years of his life, with recurring acute attacks of his diseases, and “came back to life” each time to pray and help those who needed spiritual support.

We can even say that Fr. Mikhail loved to be treated and loved doctors. He would often repeat that a doctor is the best profession on earth. Batiushka always tried to be thoughtful to doctors, giving them Orthodox literature or treats received from his spiritual children as presents.

One day in the mid-1990s, after a late appointment in his cell, when the doctor had to travel about sixty miles back along a snowy night road, batiushka suddenly turned to the Lavra steward, “It would be good to pour some gasoline to the doctor for his journey back.” The doctor and the steward exchanged glances, fearing the elder’s blessing, which could not be fulfilled anyway. And so, while leaving Sergiev Posad, when the car almost ran out of fuel, the doctor decided to fill up his old Moskvich at a gas station, at least to add ten liters of gas into the tank. Then something incomprehensible happened: the fuel dispenser began to show ten, twenty, thirty liters… Soon the fuel tank was overfilled, with fuel flowing over the asphalt with a risk of igniting. The gas station staff turned off the electricity in a panic, and only then did the “refueling” of the car stop. It turned out that the gas pump was out of order and ceased cutting the fuel supply at that very minute. The operator did not take money for the “overflow”.

Once, when Fr. Mikhail was very unwell, doctors from Moscow arrived, adjusted the prescribed medication, and left. The elder took his medicine properly, but he was no better. When the doctors visited him a week or two later, he wondered why it was happening. They looked at each other and, as if apologizing, uttered, “Well, we wanted… we thought...” Interrupting their inarticulate speech, batiushka said pointblank, “You should not want and think, but know and do!” However, after reproaches he would always add something comforting, so it was absolutely impossible to take offense.

Nikolai Vladimirovich Kostenko, one of the doctors who treated Fr. Mikhail, recalled: “After the operation in 1996 and right until his death, batiushka was under constant supervision by the Lavra doctors and doctors from Moscow, who visited him regularly in his cell. And now, on the eve of his centenary, I remember a conversation that took place a few years before his repose, when his condition deteriorated once again and he was weak. Adjusting the medication, the doctors explained their actions to him, ‘Father, we hope that our efforts will help you live till at least 100.’ Fr. Mikhail immediately replied cheerfully, ‘This does not suit me! I want eternal life!’”

A peaceful repose

Part 2. “Jump more cheerfully!”. Hieromonk Pafnuty (Fokin) (3) Funeral service over Fr. Mikhail Fr. Mikhail fell asleep in the Lord on July 14, 2009 a little after three in the afternoon. There were no special external signs indicating that the elder would soon pass away. In the final years of his life, he was very poorly and infirm: it seemed that nothing kept him here anymore. He couldn’t even lift his eyelids on his own: his fingers wouldn’t bend either. And in order to see his visitors he had to lift his eyelids with the part of his hand that could move…

On his final night, Fr. Mikhail hardly slept. “Rejoice, O thou Bride unwedded,” he very often repeated the refrain from the akathist to the Mother of God, as if half-conscious, half asleep. At nine in the morning, the private monastic rule usually began, but on that day they did not wake up the elder, because he had just fallen asleep. When Fr. Mikhail woke up at around eleven and found out what time it was, he got a little angry; they should have woken him up at nine anyway—the prayer rule should start on time, and bodily infirmities are not a reason to delay it.

The Lavra doctor, Fr. Tikhon, was to come after lunch. At around two in the afternoon the elder’s condition worsened, and he began to gasp for breath. The doctor immediately determined that Fr. Mikhail was dying. The deputy abbot arranged for a priest with Holy Gifts to be sent for. One of the hieromonks had the Holy Gifts prepared for another sick person who could not be given Communion that day. With some surprise, the hieromonk recalled later that it seemed that the Holy Gifts had been waiting for the elder. Having received Communion, Fr. Mikhail soon lost consciousness, as if falling asleep peacefully. By that time many people at the Lavra had learned about what was happening, and the brethren began to gather in Fr. Mikhail’s cell. Candles were lit. They began to sing the Canon for the Departure of the Soul from the Body. Fr. Tikhon held Fr. Mikhail’s hand, feeling his pulse, and when reading the final prayer, he said that the elder had passed away. After the dismissal they began to sing the canon for the departed with lit candles and a large concourse of the brethren. It was done with great solemnity.

After the end of the canon, the brethren proceeded to the church. The evening service was just commencing. While the service was going on, Fr. Mikhail’s body was vested in the funeral schema robes. After the service, the brethren went from the church to the elder’s cell, served the Litia there and transferred the elder’s body to the Church of the Holy Spirit while singing hymns. There was not only a sense of triumph, but also of strict order. Everything fit into the monastic way of life.

Part 2. “Jump more cheerfully!”. Hieromonk Pafnuty (Fokin) (4) Fr. Mikhail’s grave at the monastic cemetery in Deulino In his condolences to the father-superior and the brethren of the Lavra, His Holiness Patriarch Kirill noted:

“I received with sorrow the news of the repose of one of the oldest monks of the Holy Trinity-St. Sergius Lavra, Schema-Archimandrite Mikhail (Balaev). His monastic service that lasted almost half a century began under the protection of the Holy Hierarch Joasaph of Belgorod. When he was tonsured into the schema, the holy Archangel Michael became his Heavenly patron and intercessor, which was a sign of Schema-Archimandrite Mikhail’s ardent faith and his zealous service to the Lord. For twenty years the ever-memorable monk diligently performed his obedience for the glory of God at the Patriarchal Residence in Peredelkino. Due solemnity was maintained through his diligence, and the continuity of ancient traditions was preserved. Over the past two decades, Father Mikhail diligentluy labored in monastic ascetism within the walls of the Holy Trinity-St. Sergius Lavra, gaining the respect and love of the brethren. In connection with your bereavement, I express my sincere condolences to you, Your Eminence and Father-Superior, and to all the brethren of the monastery. May the Lord give rest to the soul of the newly departed Schema-Archimandrite Mikhail. Memory eternal to him!”

Schema-Archimandrite Mikhail was buried at the monastic cemetery in the village of Deulino of the Sergiev Posad district.

Sayings of the elder

The Lavra brethren and spiritual children of Fr. Mikhail have kept in their hearts and passed on to us some of the elder’s sayings, which can edify us even now. Here are some of them:

  • A person does not become a monk when he is tonsured, but already in the world when the heart is inflamed with love for Christ.

  • No one knows the greatest ascetics. Maybe some old woman from the boondocks saves the whole world by her prayers.

  • Many people pray with their very lives.

  • You shouldn’t take on yourselves spiritual labors beyond your strength. Avoid overstraining; your souls need rest too—to admire nature or go to the holy spring.

  • Everything should be done in moderation. We should live more simply. You can eat for the glory of God or sleep for the glory of God. Everyone has their own measure, to get enough sleep.

  • You can keep a strict fast, but not with strain and irritation, and not with a sullen face. If you feel joy and consolation from moderate fasting, then you can do it.

  • You shouldn’t do anything by way of podvig, with strain. It is very dangerous to pray excessively, as it leads to breakdowns and despondency.

  • You should be wary of a formal attitude towards prayer. You shouldn’t pray without attention, only for the sake of numbers—as if you were sorting peas.

  • To die during obedience is a special mercy of God, but to ruin yourself with excessive zeal, so that you cannot do anything anymore, is a great sin.

  • The most terrible thing is to grip your soul in a vice. When a monk or a layman begins to struggle, he humbles and forces himself so much that he “ties” everything “tightly” and does not let his soul breathe—there is no joy, no living prayer. Later he falls into despondency or spiritual delusion from that.

  • We must let our souls rejoice, dancing and leaping (cf. 2 Sam. 6:21), just as King David rejoiced in the Lord. Can we not rejoice in Him? This will be genuine prayer!

  • We must multiply the talents with which the Lord has endowed us: he who can sing, let him sing; he who can teach, let him teach; he who can draw, let him draw. The Lord will ask us sternly how we have used our talents.

  • Don’t judge anyone! Put your nose under your arm and smell yourself there!

  • Flowers always grow on tears.

  • Despondency is a sin. Always rejoice; this is the right state of mind. Rejoice spiritually. The prayer rule can be sung joyfully—this is real prayer.

  • It is very useful to write down passages from Patristic books—the parts that have impressed you most. After you reread them, they will warm your heart again. This is also prayer.

  • You mustn’t regard the Lord as your servant.

  • There is no truth on earth. The truth is in Heaven. But we have a particle of Heaven on earth—this is the Holy Church.

  • It’s very good when you succeed in something and don’t succeed in something else. You will humble yourself, make efforts and pray simultaneously.

The elder’s most frequent and memorable instruction was the words that he used to say at parting, “Jump more cheerfully!” Such a joyous and inspiring blessing remained in your soul for a long time.

Part 2. “Jump more cheerfully!”. Hieromonk Pafnuty (Fokin) (2024)
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